Angry Bushes Return — the Us Need Wipe sequel

You are a roll of toilet paper. The shrubbery is armed. Free, no download, no account — it runs in this browser tab.

How to play

• Move with the mouse, the arrow keys or WASD. On a phone, drag anywhere on the screen.
• Firing is automatic. Your hands are full.
• Hold Shift to slow down for tight gaps. P pauses, M mutes.
• Do not shoot CLEAN-O. He is the polite one with the towel. Fly into him instead.

Dying makes the game bigger, not shorter

Most arcade games send you back to the start. This one doesn't. Every wipe advances the Stall, which reseeds the music and the palette of every level and makes the hedge angrier. Ply, the currency, is earned for life and never spent — it only unlocks, from Double Ply through to Bidet Overdrive. A bad run still moves you forward.

The soundtrack is generated, not recorded

No audio files are downloaded. Each level seeds its own key, chord progression, tempo and drum pattern, and the whole thing is synthesised in your browser as you play. Even the shots are tuned to the chord currently sounding, so the shooting stays inside the arrangement. Reach a new level, hear a track that has never existed before.

Who you are up against

Angry Bush, Bush Scout, Armed Bush, Bush Gunner, The Legion and The Reaper — with King Log holding court every fifth level. Every bush that slips past you feeds the Hedge Rage meter, and a full meter costs you a life, so letting them through is not a neutral choice.

Play the original

This is the sequel to Us Need Wipe, a race-to-the-castle board game where you roll, run and wipe before the bushes catch you. Clear three rounds over there and it unlocks a door straight to this one.